


No more

by Bill_Longbow



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Crisis of Faith, Gen, Not Canon Compliant, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:06:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24444796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bill_Longbow/pseuds/Bill_Longbow
Summary: After watching the current events unfold Steve wonders if he is strong enough to cope.
Relationships: Steve Rogers & Tony Stark
Comments: 8
Kudos: 35





	No more

**Author's Note:**

> Current affairs in US made me sad and nauseous this morning, so I wrote this as a way to deal with it. This is not meant as a way to incite a debate or to influence anyone's political views, I just needed to get this off my chest.

Tony cautiously makes his way into the common room. There's the flickering of the tv, but no sound, and usually that means JARVIS turned it off for whatever unlucky soul finally managed to fall asleep. 

When he enters it's not to the sight of one of his passed out teammates, but to something that shakes him to his core.

Amidst various news streams and twitter feeds thrown up around the space like in a newsroom sits Steve, and he's crying. 

Tony never saw him this distraught, and they've dealt with their fair share of horror over the years. His entire posture is slumped, barely lifting his head high enough to take in all the information, big tears rolling down his cheeks unimpeded.

A quick scan of the news -- civilian killed by police brutality, POTUS trying to destroy the first amendment, rioters shot at -- makes Tony nauseous, sure, but he doesn't understand Steve's level of distress yet. 

In a few big strides he is at Steve's side and pulls him into a hug, relieved when Steve wraps his long arms around Tony's waist and buries his face against Tony's stomach. 

Tony feels completely helpless when big sobs wrack through Steve's body, and all the soft and encouraging sounds he makes are woefully inadequate. There's nothing Tony can do but to be there and wait his friend out. 

"I can't do it anymore, Tony," Steve sobs almost incomprehensible. "I can't…"

Steve saying he's unable to do something is even more shocking than finding him in tears, and it leaves Tony terrified.

"I don't understand," he says, rubbing up and down Steve's back in an effort to soothe him. 

Steve pulls back enough to look up at Tony. His naked vulnerability nearly breaks Tony. 

"It's too much, I can't anymore. I just…” New sobs overtake him, but this time Steve doesn't hide his face, this time he watches the news roll past. 

_ Fires rage as protests spread,  _ _ The US will end its moratorium on the production and deployment of landmines,  _ _ grandma steps in front of police guns to protect grandson, Hispanic Americans hit hardest by layoffs, police arrest CNN crew, US to withdraw from Open Skies Treaty… _ On and on it goes. 

"I… I can't be their symbol anymore," Steve whispers, and wipes his face with his ridiculously large hands. 

Not with all his brain power can Tony even begin to imagine what it must be like for Steve. He lost so much for his country, for the sake of democracy and justice and doing the right thing. Only to have it all crumble to ashes around him.

Tony can't imagine what it must be like. He does know however that Steve can't give up now. 

"Steve, you--  _ we _ can’t give up now. That means they won.”

Steve nods, his gaze glued on the horrors that are the world news today.

“J, cut the feeds,” Tony orders, because he knows Steve knows all the articles and clips by heart. 

“It’s too much…” Steve sounds small as he looks down, defeated. “I don’t know what to do anymore…”

Tony doesn’t know either. The silence between them is fraught with tension and grief. 

The Maria Stark foundation is working overtime to give relief, demand ever growing. They all lobby and tweet and try to lead by example, but it's inadequate when Nazis roam the streets again and laws are passed that endanger the health and safety of those already in need.

“I agreed to Project Rebirth to fight a regime like this… I want my home back.”

Tony sighs. He doesn’t know if Steve means way back when, or way back before the current administration. He supposes it doesn’t matter much, since all they have is now.

“We can join the marches again? I’ll fly us over to Minneapolis in a jiffy…” It wouldn’t be the first time they joined protests.

Steve looks away from Tony, making it even harder to know what he’s thinking. Already the serum is working hard to remove all traces of his moment of weakness. No red rimmed eyes or dark bags will reveal how badly he suffers from nightmares and insomnia.

He turns back to nod, then visibly pulls himself together and stands. “Thank you, Tony. Let’s go.”

They meet in the quinjet hangar, and to Tony’s surprise Steve is in civvies, but carrying the shield on his back. His jaw is set in that way that tells Tony there’s no arguing him out of it, not that he wanted to try.

“I thought you were tired of being a symbol?” 

Steve hesitates, but then nods. “I am.”

“It’s one thing to join a march as Steve Rogers, it’s another as doing it as Captain America.” Tony isn’t trying to talk Steve out of it, but he owes it to his friend to make him see the possible consequences.

“Tony, you and the suit are one, same thing goes for me and the shield. If I can’t stand by to watch my country go to shit, then this goes for us both, for me and Captain me.”

It’s the little dumb pun that tells Tony Steve is okay again, and he nods in relief.

“I want to give the people hope, something to rally behind, to show them they’re not wrong, and that they’re not alone. Because this is what the shield means to me,  _ hope.  _ It's an honor if I can carry that symbol for others as well."


End file.
